Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
