By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Randomize
