Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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