True but thats because hes a fetus.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
They took my balls.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
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