i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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