yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Randomize
