its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
Randomize
