i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Randomize
