Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
