So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Randomize
