On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize