You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
The air taste purple.
Randomize
