What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Only a mothe r could love this liver
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Randomize
