We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I feel like I'm in dance class right now
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.�
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
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