Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
you never un-have a 4some
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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