You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
