whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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