I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
