Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
