just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
