I bet he comes in French.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Bring me that man meat
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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