You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Randomize
