went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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