Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
