She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
