Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize
