everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
