he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize
