It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
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