i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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