is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
