Whod you bang
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
