We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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