if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
