dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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