My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
