i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
