That's intense
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Randomize
