he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
