is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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