i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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