I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Randomize
