apparently the secret to your success is patron
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Randomize
