doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
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