So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
