that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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