He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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