No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
