lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Randomize
