HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Randomize
